The Show Must Go On...We Must Let Go & Move On

This weekend I had the pleasure of attending my school's musical. I approach any event cognizant of all of the work that goes into making it happen. So often, we take for granted the product that is put in front of us without realizing, understanding, or appreciating all of the effort that went into producing it. Taking a group of middle school students and creating a production that everyone, not just the families of the participating students, would be lucky to enjoy is no small feat. I will not pretend to understand how the directors in a middle school production get from point A to point B. However, I do think we can assume they do not get there by holding on to things that are not working or things that are not necessary.

Prior to attending the musical, I was planting my springtime flowers and my summer vegetable garden. In doing so, I found myself pruning plants, taking off old flowers and dead leaves. Dead leaves on a plant, if left to linger, can cause the entire plant to suffer. This is so much like us! We carry things around physically, mentally and emotionally, even though they no longer serve us, only to watch the things that we care about wither away due to our lack of ability to tend to their needs.

And so I challenge you, just as the directors of the Middle School Musical must have done, to let go of those things that no longer serve you, your purpose, or your goals. This will look different for each one of us and it's not a one-and-done. The letting go of what no longer serves us is a lifelong endeavor and not always concrete. Perhaps it's our desire for things to stay the same. Or maybe we are holding onto grudges or anger or jealousy. Sometimes it's insufficient self-care due to the lack of ambition to take care of ourselves with healthy food, exercise or adequate sleep. The thing is, we get into patterns or habits, and we forget that we need to let go and move on. Let this post be your reminder; your catalyst. 

Now that my school's musical is over, the cast, crew and directors will take the memories and lessons with them. They will no doubt hold onto thoughts that will linger in their minds with a sense of accomplishment. They will leave behind however, the long hours of rehearsals and the tedium of memorization of lines and songs. They will move on to make room for the next goals they set for themselves and all the work and energy necessary to reach them. I challenge you to do the same for the show must go on and for that to happen, we must move on.

Want to share how you are letting go of what you no longer need? Leave a comment here, online, or email me at: School2HomeConnections@outlook.com

Enjoy reading what I write? Copies of my book, Connections Across the Student Desk, are available on Amazon: LINK HERE  or Barnes and Noble: LINK HERE

Wish I could come speak to your staff and colleagues? Give me the topic, I'll make it come alive! Contact me! School2HomeConnections@outlook.com

Adults Unite! You Are Not Alone!!!

With the school year entering its final stages, consider the year behind you. Think about your most challenging moments in the classroom if you're a teacher, or if you're a parent/guardian the most challenging moments with your child at home. Were there moments when you just couldn't get a handle on a situation? Episodes of feeling you weren't being heard? Respected? Effective? When they have needs that need to be met, children have an uncanny way of making us feel ineffective and inadequate. It's just part of their charm. But this post is not about children. 

Well, actually it's all about them by being about you and me, the adults in the life of children.

What I'm attempting to describe is the frustration we can feel as teachers or parents and guardians when we are functioning as a single adult in the life of a child. We have created a culture where everyone believes they have to function alone. We have in essence, divorced home from school, and school from home, and forgotten that children need us to work together.

I hear your thoughts as you're reading this:

"If I invite parents/guardians to help, they will walk all over me."

"They're the problem! Why would I try to work with them?"

"They're the professionals. They should be able to help my kid. That's what they get paid to do."

But I believe if we listen closer, we will hear a different story. One that is clothed in fears and insecurities:

"I'm afraid to call that parent/guardian. I've heard how they can be." (Give it a try! Maybe you can be the first one to help them feel that they are part of the team.)

"I'm not going to pick up the phone when I see the school calling. I never understand what they mean, and I always feel attacked. I'm not able to talk with them and feel confident that they will listen to what I'm saying." (Sure, they may be the educator, but you are the expert on your child and they need your input.)

"That parent/guardian is difficult. They believe their child does no wrong and will just blame me." (Try to call them seeking a solution, not to determine blame. Maybe you can be the one to build the relationship that will help their child succeed in school and beyond.)

"I'm working three jobs just to support my children and me. I cannot take calls during the day. The school will have to deal with it themselves." (Try to think of other ways to communicate with the school about your child. In this age of technology, we have e-mail, texting, or even the old-time paper and pen. Let's find a way that we can work together.)

There are a plethora of reasons home and school don't take the time to create the relationship necessary for student success. None of them are valid!  I know this sounds harsh, but it is irresponsible to deprive students of this imperative relationship. It doesn't have to be so difficult, scary, or perhaps the worst... indifferent. Students, all students, need to know the adults in their life are united to provide the support they need to succeed inside and outside of school. And you, the teachers and parents/guardians, need to know you are not alone! Your mutual respect, communication and support is available to you whenever you make the choice to build the connection for the benefit of the children who matter in your life. 

What tips can you share for making the most of the school to home connection? Please leave a comment here or where you found this post.

Want help navigating the school/home relationship? Leave a comment here or email me at: School2HomeConnections@outlook.com

Enjoy reading what I write? Copies of my book, Connections Across the Student Desk, are available on Amazon: LINK HERE  or Barnes and Noble: LINK HERE

Wish I could come speak to your staff and colleagues? Give me the topic, I'll make it come alive! Contact me! School2HomeConnections@outlook.com

Have I Told You Lately About Your Purpose?

Our school building is currently under restorative construction and so each morning when I arrive, I cross paths with various construction workers in the parking lot. We exchange morning pleasantries then enter the building at our respective entrances. Two occupations with differing purposes entering
the same building. A day of work ahead, both with the intention of creating, building on past successes, and making progress toward our goals. Assuming we each do our job well we will leave the same building at the end of the day having made a difference. We will have affected change and growth and made advances in our respective endeavors. The changes will be subtle, so much so that we will not even think about them, but if we hadn't shown up, the loss would be felt.

About twenty minutes after our arrival, the front doors open and about 600 middle school students enter the same building. They have yet another set of goals. Or do they? If you were to ask your students what their goal is when they enter the school building, what do you think they would say? I realize this answer will differ depending on the age of your students. As a middle school teacher, and the mother of a high school student, this question holds a lot of weight. 

Why does it matter? Let's think about it. Construction workers have their blueprints. They have very specific instructions to follow that will undoubtedly lead them closer and closer to achieving their final goal. Teachers follow lesson plans based on the scope and sequence of their curriculum to guide their instruction day after day, inform their classroom management and instill work habits to help their students grow. Though we may often feel as though we are constantly changing our direction to meet student needs, we really do have an end goal that we are aiming to achieve; work alongside parents to guide children in becoming decent human beings.

But what about our students' purpose? If our students don't know why they are showing up to school, if they don't have a purpose beyond compulsory education, can any of the rest of us entering that building really achieve our goals? Sure, the building will be restored, repaired, and improved. Certainly, lesson plans will be followed, curriculum spoken, and skills modeled. But how much does any of that matter if students don't know what it is they are trying to achieve beyond staying awake until the conclusion of the school day?

As is my way as I'm sharing my thoughts I often pause and go back to read what I have written, and wow those words seem dire. But there is hope and it is in your voice! Since you're here it's probably because you have kids in your life that are important to you. If you're a parent, you want what's best for your children, and you want them to grow into amazing adults. Have you told them that lately? Have you helped them chart the course to their future selves? If you're a teacher, you probably became a teacher because you thought that education was important, and you wanted to help affect the future of our world by teaching children. When is the last time you said as much to your students? 

Throughout this portion of this post I have been humming the song "Have I told you lately that I love you?" With the inundation of information and voices that our children have to endure, it is going to become more and more important for us to make sure our voices are heard by them loud and clear and often. They may be too young or too immature to understand the importance of school, but if we keep telling them that we believe it's important, that we believe their effort matters, and that we believe through hard work in school they can become an amazing human being, they will begin to believe it and find purpose in their school day. 

Enjoy reading what I write? Copies of my book, Connections Across the Student Desk, are available on Amazon: LINK HERE  or Barnes and Noble: LINK HERE

Wish I could come speak to your staff and colleagues? Give me the topic, I'll make it come alive! Contact me! maccaronicrew@outlook.com