The word I settled on actually came to me in December. It was almost a challenge, a taunting, if you will. It lingered in the air after someone told me that I have a lot of it. I tell you, it hung there staring me down, daring me to reach up and accept it. But alas, I just could not. There are many reasons for that, most notable being that I do not always feel I should have the word I've chosen. You read that correctly. The word I shall try to live in 2020 is a word that I have a difficult time accepting because I associate it with people who are incredibly powerful and have much more authority than I will ever wish to have. People like Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and his idol and hero, Mahatma Gandhi, for example. I don't want that kind of responsibility, position or power...and yet, I find myself compelled to try to live this word to its fullest meaning in my own life, in my home and in my community.
My word is not Impact. Gandhi and King made an impact for sure! I toyed around with choosing Impact but to have an impact implies having a force that controls a situation. That is not my personality, nor will it ever be. I can impact my home or my classroom with my negative or positive attitude, but it often does not feel good. There is a certain dimension of the participation of others that must be out of their control for me to impact them. I don't usually try to intentionally impact someone, for it is much more effective if they come to the realization that what I am showing them will enhance their lives, and so they then choose to follow my lead. It's a subtlty of purpose that I wish to embody.
I also considered Inspire for my 2020 One Word. Those two greats most definitley inspired many! And while I hope I inspire others, it is not a trait that I think I necessarily need to work on owning or giving freely. I am always ready to give a little shove, a little encouragement, a little hint of inspiration to help someone along their way. I am often intentional in generating a feeling of "You've got this!" It comes naturally to me and I feel completely competent in inspiring others since it really is no reflection on me to do so. There is no part of Inspiration that implies I have something you need, it simply takes what someone already possesses and shows them where it is. No skin off my back, as the saying goes.
With lack of confidence so clearly being the reason I did not commit to my word sooner, one might conclude (as I said to a Twitter friend) that perhaps "Confidence" should have been my word for 2020. Here's the kicker, that was my 2019 word. Can't tell, right? I know. I'm still working on it. But this year's word will challenge me even more than Confidence challenged me to live it as though I own it. I will need to say it over and over, again and again, to solidify it in my mind and accept it as something I need to do.
Influence
Influence
Influence
Influence
Influence
There it is. "Influence". It is my hope that in 2020 I will have the confidence necessary to Influence the people and situations around me. Influence...it's a subtle word. It sneaks in and changes people without ever demanding a thing. Gandhi influenced King without ever intending to. I hope to Influence others toward their own personal greatness. I hope to Influence those who spew negativity to help them consider optimism. I hope to Influence those who tend toward gossip to choose kindness. I believe I have the power, but not always the confidence, to positively Influence situations, circumstances and actions just by being me. Influence. It's subtle...and that is what will help me to own it.
I hope you challenged yourself with a One Word 2020 that will make you stretch. If you wouldn't mind sharing, I'd love to hear how you will try to grow into a better version of you in 2020 just by changing how you live one little word.
